1 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. 2 Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea, 3 though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling. Selah 4 There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy habitation of the Most High. 5 God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved; God will help her when morning dawns. 6 The nations rage, the kingdoms totter; he utters his voice, the earth melts. 7 The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah 8 Come, behold the works of the LORD, how he has brought desolations on the earth. 9 He makes wars cease to the end of the earth; he breaks the bow and shatters the spear; he burns the chariots with fire. 10 “Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!” 11 The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah
Tonight I find tremendous comfort in Psalm 46. God is my refuge, strength, help, and fortress. He is oh so very present. Though the earth gives way, mountains moved, waters roar…I will rejoice in the LORD. Tonight I needed more faith, HE generously gave. I thought I might crumble, but he scooped me up, gave me strength and tucked me into my refuge- Himself.
Charlie spiked a 105 fever tonight and was having difficulty breathing. After a few days of knowing things have been “off” we now know that they definitely were. Charlie has been reintubated, meaning he is back on ventilation or the breathing machine. He was very distressed. We have many tests out in hopes of finding the source of infection. It is likely his central line or his open wound. We will be having a team conference to discuss what we will do next. We cannot sit much longer with this open wound. May God give the docs, surgeons, and parents wisdom. God have mercy on my precious little Charlie.
I had a beautiful day at home with my family before this all went down. Just being with my children, reading stories, snuggling, kisses, holding, giggling, talking, singing, praying, discussing God’s goodness, and being reminded of what a joy it is to be a mother. There really is no other job in the whole world I would rather have. I had a sweet conversation with Isaac, my four-year old a few hours ago. I was telling him that he has been SO brave by letting mommy be at the hospital with Charlie so much to help him get better. I told him I miss him SO much and can’t wait to bring Charlie home to be with him. I told him that Charlie misses him and is working very hard to get better. Isaac twinkled and almost seemed as if he was happy to be a “big” boy for Charlie’s sake. I told him that I was sure God was well pleased by how loving he was being to share mommy between home and the hospital. Isaac has missed mommy, but he is being so courageous…hmmm, Courage is his middle name. The love and faith of my children encourages my heart. It feels as if we have all linked arms and gone to the front lines to war for life, the life of little Charles Grant whom we love so much.