Tears

Psalm 42

1 As the deer pants for streams of water,
so my soul pants for you, my God.
2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When can I go and meet with God?
3 My tears have been my food
day and night,
while people say to me all day long,
“Where is your God?”
4 These things I remember
as I pour out my soul:
how I used to go to the house of God
under the protection of the Mighty One[d]
with shouts of joy and praise
among the festive throng.
5 Why, my soul, are you downcast?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and my God.
6 My soul is downcast within me;
therefore I will remember you
from the land of the Jordan,
the heights of Hermon—from Mount Mizar.
7 Deep calls to deep
in the roar of your waterfalls;
all your waves and breakers
have swept over me.
8 By day the Lord directs his love,
at night his song is with me—
a prayer to the God of my life.
9 I say to God my Rock,
“Why have you forgotten me?
Why must I go about mourning,
oppressed by the enemy?”
10 My bones suffer mortal agony
as my foes taunt me,
saying to me all day long,
“Where is your God?”
11 Why, my soul, are you downcast?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and my God.

Charlie is struggling tonight.  His breathing continues to decline and he is in obvious discomfort.  They started antibiotics again.  The feeds were stopped earlier today when they started going the wrong way.    My heart aches.  But I will choose to put my hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.

I have so much to be thankful for.  Jesus IS risen and I have a great hope for the future!  Charlie is alive, today.  I have a precious husband who loves his family and God.  I have children who are such a tremendous blessing.  We are provided for.  Our share ministry (Samaritan) is an overwhelming blessing and support.  My children played sweet praises to the Lord at a piano recital tonight.  They also blessed a nursing home with their sweet voices tonight.

Tonight I was able to go with them to hear their choir perform at the nursing home.  I was visiting with a sweet elderly woman in pink.  She was precious.  She talked to me with her eyes.  She couldn’t seem to get the words from her mind to her lips.  That was OK.  I just rubbed her arm.  Then Nathaniel came over.  Nathaniel is my sweet friend with Down Syndrome.  He simply smiled at her…she lit up and suddenly had a gleaming smile across her beautiful face.  He blessed her and caused her to feel JOY.  Nathaniel, I thank God for you.  You are so special and your hugs mean the WORLD to me, especially now.  How I long for my little Charlie to grow up like you one day.  I am thankful for that moment tonight…to see Nathaniel’s gift in bringing joy to this woman that could not communicate with us very well…except through a smile.

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2 thoughts on “Tears

    1. Oh Lida, Nathaniel has always been a tremendous blessing to me and my family. I am amazed how he always knows when to come hug me…even when there are no visible tears in my eyes. He just knows. And OH to see him sing the Halellujah chorus at the nursing home tonight- tears, thankful.

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