Take my life and let it be
Consecrated, Lord, to Thee.
Take my moments and my days,
Let them flow in endless praise.
Take my hands and let them move
At the impulse of Thy love.
Take my feet and let them be
Swift and beautiful for Thee.
Take my voice and let me sing,
Always, only for my King.
Take my lips and let them be
Filled with messages from Thee.
Take my silver and my gold,
Not a mite would I withhold.
Take my intellect and use
Every pow’r as Thou shalt choose.
Take my will and make it Thine,
It shall be no longer mine.
Take my heart, it is Thine own,
It shall be Thy royal throne.
Take my love, my Lord, I pour
At Thy feet its treasure store.
Take myself and I will be
Ever, only, all for Thee.
We knew it would happen. We didn’t want it to happen. We were enjoying having Charlie at home. We were getting used to being together. Sunday morning Charlie was not acting himself, his nose was running, and he was requiring quite a bit of oxygen. After trying many things and troubleshooting our home equipment, we determined it would be in Charlie’s best interest to have him checked out. Once in the ER he developed a fever and that put us on the 5 alarm plan for any baby with a central line and a fever. Lot’s of blood draws, lots of cultures of every fluid in his body, and the start up of antibiotics. They decided to keep us in the PICU overnight and then moved us upstairs for the transition home. Charlie returned to his baseline on Sunday evening, but they like to watch him until his cultures come back. Thankfully all was negative and he was likely just dealing with a virus that the viral panel didn’t display.
Though my strength was feeble, my mama’s heart was feeling like it was being run through a paper shredder from having to leave my sweeties at home, and the temptation for discouragement was very real- I kept singing the words to the song above and focusing on WHO I was walking this path for. How quickly my mind would stray. “Deb, you can do this for Jesus!” I would say. “Yes! I would die for Jesus- this is easy!” Later my heart would grow sad picturing Isaac’s eyes when he learned we were headed back to the hospital. “This is for your King! He will take care of Isaac. Deb, you cannot save Isaac. You cannot save your children. God can take much better care of them than you can!” By the end of the day I was exhausted and weary. When the nurse informed me that my daughter (my buddy, encourager, and helper) wasn’t old enough to stay with me…I melted. Then the words of my dear sister in the Lord rang loudly in my ears…YOU WERE MADE FOR THIS, DEBBIE! “OK Lord, there is a reason that we are back here, that I am being forced to stay here alone, and find peace and rest in YOU alone, while laying the things that are most precious to me- at your feet. Yes LORD, I will do this for you. Again. And Again. And again. I delight to do this for you. I will choose to exalt in this tribulation. For your sake- it is an honor.” I ran out of my own strength many months ago. When I go back to trusting in my own strength my faithful Father quickly reminds me that it is only His strength that will see us through this.
THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU FAITHFUL PRAYER WARRIORS. OUR MAIN PRAYER REQUEST REMAINS FOR CHARLIE’S SMALL INTESTINE TO FUNCTION PROPERLY. THIS WOULD ALLOW FOR A CASCADE OF SIMIPLIFICATION FOR CHARLIE’S MEDICAL NEEDS. PRAY FOR HIS HEMOGLOBIN TO INCREASE. PRAY FOR THE SURGERY TOMORROW TO REPLACE HIS CENTRAL LINE WOULD BE SUCCESSFUL. PRAY FOR CHARLIE’S LIFE TO BRING GREAT GLORY TO GOD!